Life as a Pastor's Kid
- Strength For Life
- 2 days ago
- 4 min read
Every time Dr. R. B. Ouellette has been at our church, he always asks my brothers and me the same question. Without fail, he asks, “Pastors’ kids are… what?” If we answer correctly, he gives each of us $20.
Pastor Ouellette was a preacher’s kid himself, and he has been asking that same question for decades to the hundreds of pastors’ kids he has met. More than simply handing out $20, he is trying to help children who have grown up in ministry think properly about the blessing they have been entrusted with. The answer that Dr. Ouellette expected from us, and instilled in each of us, is this: “Pastors’ kids are special.”
When he first began asking us that question, I didn't give it much thought. All I cared about was how quickly I was going to spend the $20 I had just earned by answering his question. But over the years, as I have reflected on that simple phrase, it has become far more valuable to me than the money ever was.
Dr. Ouellette was never trying to convince pastors’ kids that they are remarkable or exceptional in themselves. Rather, he was reminding us that, by God placing us in a pastor's home, He was placing us in a unique and blessed position. He was teaching us to see the benefit in our life situation. His strategy worked. Looking back on my own upbringing, I can think of at least three ways life as a pastor’s kid is truly special.
1. Special Role Models
Hebrews 13:7 give this instruction:“Remember them which have the rule over you, who have spoken unto you the word of God: whose faith follow, considering the end of their conversation.” The aspect of being a pastor’s kid for which I am most grateful is the access it has given me to the godly men in our churches. I have had the privilege of watching men both in Muncie and in Pensacola build strong families and successful careers while remaining also deeply involved in their local church. These men demonstrated a genuine faith in Christ. I count it a tremendous blessing to be surrounded by men whose lives I can model in the spirit of 1 Corinthians 11:1:“Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.”
There have been many times in my life when I needed wisdom for a decision or simply practical advice. Through no merit of my own, I have always had faithful men around me who have "been there, done that" and have been eager to help. Not every child has that kind of access to mature, godly men. Many pastors’ kids do. For that, I am incredibly grateful.
2. Special Access to Answers
Many people assume that pastors’ kids should already know all the answers to every Bible question. Growing up under that unspoken expectation can sometimes make your own doubts feel even heavier. The truth is that pastors’ kids are still just kids. We have questions, struggles, and seasons of doubt just like anyone else who grows up in church.
I can remember specific times in my Christian life when I wrestled with questions I couldn't answer. Instead of allowing those doubts to grow unchecked, I was able to take them to my pastor—who just happened to live in the same house as I did. Having a pastor available twenty-four hours a day to answer my random theological and biblical questions has been a greater blessing than I probably even realize today.
Beyond spiritual questions, there have been countless practical questions throughout life that the men in our church have helped answer. Whether it was childhood lessons of how to put a chain back on my bicycle, rig a fishing pole, or more recent questions, such how to set up a Roth IRA, or fix something on my truck, there has almost always been someone in our church family with the experience and willingness to help.
Not every child grows up with access to that kind of wealth of knowledge within a church family. I am thankful that, as a pastor’s kid, I did.
3. Special Opportunities to Serve
There is often an expectation that the pastor’s kids will be among the first to volunteer for ministry. Service is not only expected, it is encouraged and, in many ways, woven into everyday life.
When you're young, the expectation to serve in ministry can certainly feel like a burden. But the older I have become, the more I have appreciated the countless opportunities I was given that many children never experience. What I once viewed as a liability has become one of the greatest assets in my life.
Setting up for fellowships, cleaning the church building, making hospital visits, and sharing meals with church members were all regular parts of my childhood. At the time, some of those responsibilities felt like chores. Looking back now, I realize they were quietly shaping my character, teaching me the value of serving, and developing habits that continue to benefit me today.
Probably everyone reading this article knows of pastors’ kids who have walked away from the faith or who have grown resentful of their upbringing. Sadly, that happens far too often. Had it not been for the kindness of God's people throughout the years—and the continual reminder from Dr. Ouellette that pastors’ kids truly are special—I very well might have become one of those stories.
By God's grace, that has not been my path.
I am deeply grateful to the Lord for allowing me to grow up in a pastor's home. Looking back, I can honestly say that being a pastor's kid was never about being better than anyone else. It was about being uniquely blessed with godly examples, faithful counsel, and countless opportunities to serve Christ alongside His people. Those are gifts I hope I never take for granted.
The above article was written by Andrew Johnson. He is on part-time staff at NorthStone Baptist Church in Pensacola, Fl. To offer him your feedback, comment below or email us at strengthforlife461@gmail.com.
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